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“How lucky am I to have something that makes saying goodbye so hard.”
– Winnie-the-Pooh

Only a week ago, as the morning sun began to spill into her room, my beautiful Grandmother slipped from the bonds of Earth and woke up in Eternity. Though we are thankful that her struggle is over, her passing has left deep wounds and a weariness of body and soul.

Normally, writing can be cathartic, but I haven’t posted in the last week because I simply couldn’t bring myself to put pen to paper. I am hoping that by starting again with a Wilderness Wednesday, I can find my voice.

I visited my Nana on the Saturday of the long weekend, the day before she fell and broke her leg. She knew who I was, smiling as she looked deeply into my eyes,  gripping my hand tightly. We took her for a walk  in her wheelchair and stopped to look at the flowers in the garden. She watched me take this photo. The sun was so warm and inviting. Finally, we looked at her pretty new clothes, and I rubbed cream on her hands and admired her new nail polish. And when it was time to go, I kissed her forehead and whispered, “I love you”.

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The next day, we received the call that she had fallen and they were sending her to the hospital. I went with my Mom and spent that first day with her. I took a turn stroking her hair and face, and tucking the blankets around her toes. It was hard to leave because, while I didn’t want to admit it, I knew I might not see her again.

* * *

This past Saturday, we gathered together as a family to remember and to honour this woman that we loved. And the sun was still shining.

“You must learn some of my philosophy. Think only of the past as its remembrance gives you pleasure.” – Jane Austen, Pride and Prejudice

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