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Dear Santa,

I would like a plumber for Christmas, one who is affordable, knowledgeable and knows how to use a belt. It has been nearly 4 weeks since Hubby took the bathroom sink apart to “see what was the matter” only to discover that the drain was cracked and another important pipe was disintegrating.

Hubby is wise. He is very handy around the house but also knows his limitations. He knows that this home renovation, like so many before it, will only get worse and grow bigger the further he gets into it. Also, he has a broken toe.

It took us a remarkably short time to find a new vanity and sink since we couldn’t get an existing top in the tiny size we needed. Our 1960’s bathroom was not built for 2! In the interim, we are using our bath tub to wash our hands and brush our teeth. Once Hubby removed the old vanity, he removed the temptation to spit in the existing sink (for which I am very grateful! Now if I could  only remember to remove the hair trap in the tub before we spit…)

I am asking for a plumber who can fix the pipe and install the new vanity and taps so I may once again enjoy the luxury of not having to bend over and aim at the same time, as well as wash my delicates in something other than a pink plastic bowl. I’m also going to greedy and ask that this plumber take a look at our toilet too. I’m not a gambler and the 50% of it actually flushing (especially when you desperately want to eliminate noxious-producing substances) is wreaking havoc with my nerves (which in turn wreak havoc with my body, which in turn creates more noxious substances, etc.) Also, it doesn’t always want to stop running…and that long-tired sigh it makes when the tank is full is growing louder and longer. While I appreciate the sentiment, it is unnerving.

I’ve lived this long with the sea foam green bath tub and the salmon tiles, not to mention that incredibly tight spaces and lack of storage – don’t you think I’ve suffered enough (see photo below)?

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Just a plumber, please, and I’ll even be reasonable…a plumber…before Christmas  2016!