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I haven’t been posting regularly on Thursdays and I know I’ve been missed. Ok, no one has noticed, but…

Since Big Guy moved in (temporarily) 8 weeks ago…I have been immersing myself in an epic battle for the universe. After pretending to listen  listening to Big Guy talk about the video game for years, he finally got me to agree to give try it.  In the process, I’ve learned a few things about myself:

  • I can’t drive military vehicles. I drive off cliffs, get stuck on every tree, bush and mountain in my path, and roll over in the blink of an eye. Flying is much, much worse.
  • I am guilty of committing “friendly fire” more often than I am a victim of it.
  • I shouldn’t be allowed to carry grenades. I tend to blow myself up! Or I blow Big Guy up! Or both…
  • My reflexes are terrible. So is my aim. Unless my enemies are kind enough to come 1 or 2 at a time, or I have time to aim carefully. Then I’m a good shot. I’m an amazing sniper!
  • I usually follow orders.
  • If Big Guy is shooting a vehicle out of the air, it will probably land on me.
  • I can’t navigate.
  • I also can’t jump…but I can run. I run away from Hunters, Brute Chieftains, grenades…pretty much anything that explodes or can kill me with one hit.
  • When too many enemies come at me at once, I panic and hit the wrong buttons. Sometimes that works in my best interest. Sometimes not.
  • Thank goodness…

…because I respawn A LOT!

  • I need to wait for Big Guy to answer when I ask questions. For example, I asked him which button to push to shoot, then pulled a trigger, punched him in the face and killed him. We had been playing less than 10 seconds.
  • Apparently alien parasites and Big Guy look the same.
  • I may walk like a “dude” but I can still rock body armour with a pink emblem.
  • It’s always “hammer time” when I have a Brute Chieftain’s hammer.
  • “The Flood” is not referring to water or an overwhelming need to pee. It’s much worse than an overwhelming need to pee while trapped in a subway car, between tunnels, in the dark…
  • I will run into the fray to protect Big Guy, even if it means I will die.

You may think I’m immature and I need to act my age, but before you pass judgment –

  • growing up is optional and I like to leave my options open.
  • If my adult kid wants to hang out with me, then I’m doubly blessed!
  • And I read somewhere that video games are good for me.

Let’s just say that if this were real life…

I have some blog posts reading to do too! 🙂 Happy Weekend!

 

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