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Mark Twain said, “Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn’t do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover.”

Before I push too far from the harbour in 2014, I thought it would be fun (especially for those who have recently joined my madness) to do a quick review of the highlights of 2013, to see where I’ve been…

In January, Big Guy turned OLD – actually he turned 23 but it’s been a family joke, (thanks to my brother many moons ago) that 23 is OLD. We mourned his loss with chocolate cake. I wanted more chocolate cake when Little Guy almost broke my nose and after a trip to the book store, where I made a startling discovery!

In February, we enjoyed a lovely snow storm (which provided ample opportunities for unwanted outdoor exercise), and I compiled and publicly published my list of boyfriends

In March, I dug out my belly dance costume and DVD – Little Guy walked in when I was trying it out and I just hope I didn’t scar him for life. I also bought new “hooker” boots in March and discovered that size 6 is considered a plus size?? After that I really needed a vacation!

In April, Hubby’s car accident = a new car, which I bought all by myself! I shared why I no longer take bubble baths. But the biggest event of the month was turning the BIG 40! I was blessed to celebrate with a super Surprise Birthday Party!

In May, I tackled a tendentious undertaking that I had intended to do before my 40th birthday – I got a tattoo. It was my highest traffic day of the year with 80 views!

In June, we started house hunting. I had my heart broken by a beautiful century home – so much so that I haven’t even written about it. Instead I discussed things like crack hoes, cans of clothes, mirror smears, the pickle heads, and big bottom construction. I also discovered that I can now wear size 2 jeans!

In July, I took an uncharacteristic leap of faith – I registered and started training for Mud Hero. Gack! July was also the month of random acts of coffee…and my encounter with a perky blonde driver

In August, my entire focus became planning my funeral surviving Mud Hero! Yes people – I was completely submerged (accidentally) in thick, gooey mud – and I loved it! As they say, “the best part never washes away”!

In September, I went from the sublime to the ridiculous by exploring dashboard batmans, diabolical little screws, and creepy car ads.

In October, I moved into the realm of officially unretired. I conducted my won survey of worst drivers and started participating in the weekly photo challenges.

In November, I shared a family story from WWII, and with the distractions of work, the 5 Fridays were devoted to TMI: Terrible Mental Images!

And finally in December, I had fun researching some past Christmas trends. I also ate Humble Pie (while watching my new diamonds sparkle…sometimes sentimentality is over-rated…) and I’ve let my business go…

Some visitors came to jennsmidlifecrisis searching for things like hooker boots, midlife crisis jokes, chocolate bunny psychology tests, and tattoos – that’s one strange combination. WordPress informed me that “the concert hall at the Sydney Opera House holds 2,700 people. This blog was viewed about 8,600 times in 2013. If it were a concert at Sydney Opera House, it would take about 3 sold-out performances for that many people to see it”. I’m not sure I can compare myself with the opera, but seeing the numbers in print certainly made me want to sing. I”m truly humbled.

Throughout the year I’ve shared personal confessions and posted lots of photos…and now I have a new camera (thanks Hubby)!January has arrived and it’s time to see what adventures and disasters await me. It’s time to slip on my sassy green boots…

Learn from the past, set vivid, detailed goals for the future, and live in the only moment of time over which you have any control: now. -Denis Waitley