I stood over the sink this morning, sipping my tea and watching the steam roll off the Mickey Mouse bed sheets on the clothesline. It all started a slow-moving train.

I bought those Mickey Mouse sheets when Big Guy was 7. We had just moved into our apartment and I really wanted to make Big Guy’s new room special, but we didn’t have much money. I settled for sheets and matching curtains. Those same curtains just replaced the jungle animal curtains in Little Guy’s room.

Change can be good. Change means maturity, knowledge, beginnings. Change can also mean endings. We recently removed the foam jungle animals with googly eyes from Little Guy’s room; I had painstakingly put them together to decorate the nursery. This week we exchanged all the superhero and Transformer socks for plain socks. We packed up the Snuggle Puppy book to make room for Captain Underpants books. The Tooth Fairy visited again. And Big Guy…he moved out 4 years ago this month…

Boys do not grow up gradually. They move forward in spurts like the hands of clocks in railway stations. – Cyril Connolly

…I’m not ready. I don’t even know what I want to be when I grow up…