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Yes! Yes! Yes! I wanted to scream it out while experiencing a deliciously intense and delirious moment of ecstasy! Not only were my curves being hugged, but the button was done up…and I was comfortable!

I had a decision to make; one that I knew would inevitably end in tears. I seriously did not expect this decision to end in tears of joy. The dilemma: Time is running out before the end of school, so do I go shopping for jeans or bras?  I’ve lost enough weight (of course I’m bragging! I worked hard for it…well…sort of…) that my jeans and skirts do not fit! In December, I researched how to find the right style of jeans for my shape, but only found it more discouraging! In October, I wrote about the world’s heaviest jeans, but I’m no masochist (and they’re unjustifiably expensive). So I have put it off and worn jeans that ” bag and sag, and drag me down behind”. But I’m also 4 months overdue for my annual humiliation bra fitting…

Jeans it is! This time my straining efforts paid off, but not before trying on 4 different pairs of jeans (and 2 dresses that really looked better on the hangar). I was ready to walk out and cheat with Henry (O Henry), when I dared myself to try just One. More. Pair. in a size I am pretty sure I haven’t worn since the late 1980’s. I know what you are thinking…I was thinking it too…the emotional and physical strain has become too much for me. I am aiming for “a bridge too far”. This last pair could be like that bomb in the Dam Busters, hitting the mark with such force that I will explode in a torrent of uncontrollable hysteria, forcing the staff at Old Navy to call in the Funny Farm.

To make a long story short, check out the tag.

I'm either dreaming, drugged against my will or  I need new glasses...does that say "2"?

I’m either dreaming, drugged against my will or I need new glasses…does that say “2”?

Check it out again. I promise: the label on the jeans matches this tag, and the sticker tag that ran down the leg. I wore them yesterday, and I wanted to leave on the sticker tag that ran down the leg so that passers-by would notice and point it out to me. Then I could play dumb and remove it with a flourish like Vanna White!

Believe me! I am not wasting away – there’s still plenty of me left. But I’m suddenly finding myself with a renewed sense of urgency to avoid O Henry’s temptations so I can take these jeans new places! I’ll even write the date on this tag and laminate it for posterity, and put it in a place of honour…probably the fridge with the Grade 1 artwork and Hubby’s fridge magnet collection…and for the next few washes I will (internally) scream out: “Yes! Yes! Yes!” (I’m not ready for the Funny Farm just yet)!

p.s. I was tempted to post a picture of me in my new jeans, but it’s really hard to take a flattering picture of yourself! Happy Weekend!

Happy Weekend!

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